Storytime! Let's take the Delorean back to 2003. It was May/June. My high school graduation was coming up. Of course, all of my friends invited me to their graduation party. So I thought to myself, hmm...I should ask my parents for a party too.
It was a weekend morning and my Dad was sitting at the dinner table, drinking his coffee, and reading his newspaper - his go-to morning routine. I walked up to him and gently said "Daddy?" Here's how the rest of the convo went:
Me: Umm...with my graduation coming up in the next couple of weeks, can I have a graduation party?
Him: *slowly lowers his newspaper just so I can see his eyes* Why?
Me: Well, a lot of my other friends are having one and I think it'd be fun to have one too.
Him: NO. We don't celebrate something that's a requirement in this house. And graduating high school is a requirement. We don't celebrate that. We will celebrate when you have your bachelor's degree AND have held a full-time, benefit-eligible role for at least 6 months. Then and only then will we celebrate.
Me: *sighs & walks away*
As a parent now, I understand why my dad said that and emphasized what he did with me. Without my parents' constant tough love, I would not have had the academic excellence that I did in my life. And in case you're wondering, yes, I sure did get that party once I achieved my bachelor's and had a full-time, benefit-eligible role!
Fast forward to today, I struggle with celebrating any kind of wins. My whole life, I was taught to aim for more, to never settle, that there's always room for improvement. Always shoot for higher and never, ever stop. There should never be a point in your life where you stop chasing after something better. This mindset has helped me to achieve my personal and professional goals. Especially as a business owner, I'm still in disbelief that I'm achieving my goals. Pinch me!
But what I realized is, any time I hit a goal and I just bypass it without any acknowledgment and/or celebration at all, I feel empty inside. Ie. I reached my very first $10k month. Awesome, I know...BUT...there's no time for celebrating! What?! Celebrate?! What for?! You're not a million-dollar business yet. Let's get you there first...then you can celebrate. Sometimes I feel like celebrating means the work is done. As if I've settled by celebrating. That's not how I was taught to think! Nope...
The truth of it is - Celebrating allows me to have a deeper sense of gratitude and self-love. It means that I'm giving myself time to simmer on how I got there, who helped me along the way, and the amazing love and beauty of God who always provides for me no matter what. Celebrating allows me to pause time for a moment, smile, and say out loud "I am so proud of myself. If I can achieve this, I can achieve what's next." It increases my sense of self-trust and thus, increases my level of self-love.
At the end of the day, celebrating continues to be a struggle for me. And I'm aware of that. I'm not making it wrong anymore. I'm just allowing it to come as I see fit and celebration to me doesn't have to mean celebration on someone else's terms. I am proud of myself. That's all that matters.
💜 Mollie
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